Thanks for bringing the level of discourse down & getting the crowd all warmed up for me. I knew that someday I'd find a use for this image:
I suppose I ought to add my two "what's up with me" cents to justify adding some "being a smartass" cents.
I live in the Willamette Valley where we've cornered the market on natural beauty but have a very high unemployment rate. I'm very lucky to have a mindnumbingly boring job in the software industry in a town full of baristas, bartenders, and waitrons with master's degrees. I'm about ninety minutes away from the ocean, the mountains, or annoying hipsters (Portland). My 11-year-old daughter starts middle school in a couple of weeks.
I always thought that the Blogger account "random question" feature was a bit lame - they're trying just a little too hard to be clever and funny and never quite hit the mark. However, the question that they gave me when I signed up actually got me remembering stuff...so much stuff, in fact, that it exceeded the character limit!
Random Question:
When your science teacher smashed a frozen rose with a hammer, did you warm the petals to bring them back to life?
We never performed such heavy metaphorical acts in our science classes. However, I do remember:
- Every boy in Ms. Keeling's Life Sciences class shifting uncomfortably in his seat when a girl whose identity I mercifully conceal (not I!) asked, "Is semen nutritious?"
- Intentionally blowing up light bulbs with Amy to stave off the boredom of some experiment that was cutting into our precious locker-decorating time.
- J.J. Toupeé saying "Whatever you do, don't inhale the gas" seconds before Christopher failed to waft and instead huffed the N20 streaming out of our beaker.
- Eric A. dropping burning splints through the hole in the closet down into the biology classroom below. An impressive amount of time and number of splints elapsed before the teacher from that classroom burst into ours. No, I was not the lookout. By saying nothing, I was merely maintaining my, uh, journalistic neutrality.
- Hans and Spencer air-guitaring their way into Merle's classroom, singing "Ph-ph-ph-physics! Da-nuh-nuh!" to the tune of Def Leppard's "Foolin'."
- Mr. Ertl encouraging us to fondle, lick, and otherwise abuse mighty rocks. That's a piece of Schist! Aww, noooo, it's Gneiss! Uh-huh-huh, you said "Greywacke."
TTFN
The ghost of Miss McLouden
1 comment:
That's outrageous! I laughed out loud (or LOL as the kids say) at that post! I remember some of that stuff.
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